About Grief, Trauma, Coping, and Kindness

Readings on Grief and Trauma

Posttraumatic stress is a cluster of symptoms that can occur during and after a traumatic incident. These experiences often initially leave a person feeling powerless, victimized, and emotionally, physically, and mentally paralyzed. The types of trauma that may increase a person's chance of experiencing traumatic stress symptoms include the death of a child, hurricanes and other natural disasters, fires, mass disasters, transportation accidents (auto, plane), victimization by criminal activity (rape, burglary, assault), witnessing violence, rape, prolonged trauma such as war, and child sexual abuse. 

What are the effects?
The effects of trauma can be subtle or they can be overt. They can include extreme mood swings, uncontrollable outbursts, irrational long-term fears, physiological symptoms  (somatic) such as headaches, lethargy, digestive troubles, repetitive disturbing nightmares, and a change in appetite.  Self destructive behaviors can also appear in some such as drug or alcohol abuse. 


Some of the indicators include: 
-Reliving the event through nightmares or other uncontrollable and "intrusive" thoughts. Often this replay causes physical stressors such as heart palpitations, headaches, or sweating. 

-Avoidance of reminders related to the person who died or the event of their death, including places, people, or activities associated with the trauma.


-Hyper-arousal and sensitivity at all times making it difficult to concentrate, work, sleep, and increasing irritability, aggression, withdrawal, or isolation.



Can children experience posttraumatic stress?
Yes. But as with adults, often it can be  dismissed or misdiagnosed. It is important that children are well-supported during times of high-stress and trauma. A well-trained, mindful therapist can provide a good outlet to assess children. Books, resources, sharing or support groups, and open family discussion may also help the child.


Each situation is unique, however, someone suffering from symptoms should
consider seeking psychotherapy. Both therapeutic and community support groups are another way to help a person establish a safe place to express difficult emotions and ameliorate feelings and symptoms associated with the trauma. 


Other things that may help include:

Eating well and taking a good multiple vitamin, 
Regular physical activity, 
Establishing new routines or hobbies, 
Journaling, 
Meditation or prayer, and 
Talking with trusted friends and family. 
When children are involved, ensuring that the other family members are part of the therapy and intervention plan is critical to assist the child in more expedient resolution
of the symptoms. 

Also, remember that children may not manifest the same symptoms as adults. Their symptoms may show in social and behavioral changes such as eating and sleeping disruptions. 

Other symptoms of traumatic bereavement may include: 
• Sadness and depressive symptoms
• Denial, shock, and confusion
• Anger and irritability
• Changes in appetite
• Nightmares or sleep disturbances
• Avoiding memories of the trauma
• Hyper-sensitivity
• Tightening in chest, arms, and neck
• Feelings of panic
• Newly developed fears and phobias
• Loss of appetite
• Fear of being alone
• Physiological symptoms of illness
• Inability to concentrate or focus
• Guilt over failure to prevent the loss
• Loss of interest in usual activities
• Regressive behavior
• Forgetfulness
• Apathy
• Emotional outbursts
• Lack of motivation
• Feelings of helplessness

The Kindness Project is a way that our families often remember, honor, and cope with traumatic death.  Read about it here, get your free cards here, and experience some of the profound stories born of suffering and loss here.





Dr. Cacciatore has several chapters in this newly released book. We highly recommend it!
Neimeyer - Techniques of Grief Therapy Free brochures for download. Please observe copyright restrictions. PTS Brochure CLT Brochure Changing the Way Our Culture Mourns